"I'd scream this song, Right in your face if you were here..." ~ Story of the Year!

I was going through old blog entries and stumbled upon this list that I seemed to have forgotten in my stream of heartbreaks and whatnot:

I FINALLY know exactly what I want in a guy...

• Firstly, he should want to be with me
• Be there to hold me through the nightmare and wipe away the tears that I shed from all the damage I've been put through
• Someone who will sing me to sleep, either on the phone or in person
• Someone who will push me around in the back of a shopping cart
• Someone who fully accepts me; dreams, wishes, scars, everything
• He can't walk away from me when I need him
• Laugh at my humorous things (I can be funny)
• Don't put me down, ever
• Don't lie to me; it disappoints me more than knowing the cold truth
• Spend hours on the phone with me, just because it helps him feel close to me, and I can hear his voice; maybe even fall asleep on the phone with me
• Someone who will make me feel safe...even when I'm not in their arms
• We should have things in common, but I'm very open-minded and willing to try new things
• MUST be open-minded; if he's not, he won't be able to put up with me
• His looks are secondary, but he should be attractive in my eyes
• He should tell me I'm beautiful, because he truly thinks I am
• Finally, I just want a guy who will simply stand still with me...as if we're the only two people left in existence...or so we should feel...

Casey didn't fit this. Andrew didn't fit this. James didn't fit this. Heck, even Spencer didn't fit this. But eventually this is what I want.
So now I must tell myself to stop falling for everyone that bats their eyes at me and calls me pretty. Seriously, I need to find this someday and I won't be able to do that by going weak at the knees for every guy.

Other than that, I'm sick of being screwed over. Like, seriously, one day this guy's telling me he's done with his ex, she's psycho, no more...and then they're back together, happily. I'm done with it. I can't have anymore drama; it's exhausting. Oh yeah...just read a comment he left her on her Facebook. I'm done. They're just one of those couples that will always be a couple regardless of whether they're actually dating or not.

I'll come back later with an update of the past week, maybe.

And with that, I depart.
until next we meet...
♥*