Skip to main content

"..the heat of affection, a fragile mind, because of you..." ~ Unwritten Law<333

So I decided today that Jon and I shouldn't be together. Alot of it was because I'm not attracted to him at all, but most of it was because during church today I was praying about what I should do with this situation I'm in and God told me to get rid of Jon, that he was bringing me down and everything because he's not Christian. Yes, I am a Christian, and if you have a problem with it, I'm sorry but you shouldn't be reading my blog. I gave my life to the Lord when I was 8 years old and completely confirmed it in February when I went to a Youth Challenge at Pine Crest Bible Training Center. That was one of the greatest weekends of my entire life, and I cannot wait to hopefully go back next winter again =]

Anyways, I did it. Jon and I are over. He still loves me and cares about me...probably just a little too much, because what happened was Kyle♥ called me while I was talking to him and we made it like he was here with me, typing on my computer. Well, Jon told Kyle♥ he wants to marry me but would never tell me because he knows it would scare me (yeahh, just a little) and then went on to say that he hopes Kyle♥ can make me happy and Kyle♥ pointed out to him that I'm independent and that only I can control my happiness. Jon then had to go because he was on Donny's laptop but we got him in an off-line message and he read it with no reply. Then, he came back online and I attempted to talk to him, again with Kyle♥ on the phone with me, and Kyle♥ made me stop because he said that Jon was bringing me into depression, and he was right. At one point, I was blasting "Blurry" by Puddle of Mudd until Kyle♥ told me to shut it off and lay down in my bed. We finally came to a point of conclusion after about 45 minutes of me crying to him about how worried I was and how sorry I was that I was hurting Jon. I still care about the guy, I just don't love him. I don't think I can at this point; I love Kyle♥, and he's my best friend. Nothing's going to change that =]
And tonight was probably the last night he and I could talk as late as we did, because he starts college on Tuesday at 8am. I'm happy for him =] But I am going to miss our late-night talks about our naughty bits and such ;] Oh, how I love him! XDD

Anyways, that was my "excitement" for the day, although I did get down and out enough to make this to try and cheer myself up:
^-^ FoxtrotUniformCharlieKilo
[[I don't wanna beat around the bush]]♥


And with that, I think I'll go watch 18 Again! and dose off.

until next we meet...
♥*

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Well I may have your heart, He has your body..." ~ Bayside <3! [Don't Call Me Peanut]

And so goes another one out of my life most likely. Yep, I lost another friend in the last 48 hours; Spencer. All I can say is I'm sorry, but Cora was just telling you what I was thinking but not telling you; I wasn't going to go over to Bob's, get wasted, and potentially sleep with you. No. That's NOT how I work, and you of all people should know this by now. But whatever. Like my IM said to him earlier, he knows how to get at me. *sigh* So about how that even came about... My family went away to The Great Escape Lodge this weekend, leaving me back here in East Bumblebuttons because I had to work :/ It's all good; I had my own fun. I worked, hung out at the Bowley's house with Joanna and Melissa, hung out with Cora at Rite Aid, then even hung with Amy for a little while and talked about old times :) It definitely was super fun for me. Now how does Spencer work into this? Well, he had told me earlier in the week that he was going to go help Zach housesit for Bob
8 comments
Read more

"If it's not perfect I'll perfect it til my heart explodes..." ~ Hinder <333

Now that ^^ is an old song...at least to people my age haha! It was super popular in 2005, and then Hinder started to suck. I never gave it any thought until I heard it with Tawny today, and I was like "WHOA! This song actually makes sense to me now!" The chorus goes: Go home, get stoned We can end up making love instead of misery Go home, get stoned Because the sex is so much better when you're mad at me After dating (and having sex with) a stoner, I understand this now. Wow, am I enlightened! Hahaha! I hung out at FMCC today, mostly with Spencer as I said was going to happen :P Actually before that, I hung out with Cindy; I MISS HER LIKE CRAZY! Then I was with Spencer for almost 3 hours, until Aaron came and stole'd him away D: :P I went into the "Dungeon", found Lauren and Adam, FINALLY talked to Justin, and then saw Mike and his new girlfriend, which is a girl I've known for a couple years now named Alea. Then Tawny and I left campus, went to McDonal
6 comments
Read more

EPIPHANY! :D

If you think about it, being in love is simply settling for someone you really get along with who has similar interests that you can't describe why you feel the way you do for them but you do and it's an amazing feeling. I've always wanted to believe that love and all things related was like this biiiiig beautiful rainbow of stuff that happened and we'd all live happily ever after. WRONG! Love is exactly what my quote above says; settling for that one person who makes you happy and you get along with. Now, I've had my share of bad relationships, let's not kid ourselves, but honestly I take each one and use it towards discovering what I really want out of a longer lasting one. For instance, in my last relationship the guy I was with would walk around his town with me and show me everywhere he used to work or hang out at; I felt like I was getting a deeper understanding of him. I liked that. Unfortunately, he's addicted to pot; that I didn't like. The
4 comments
Read more