& you're in my head...♥

It's such a cute song I'm listening to, "Dear Jamie...Sincerely Me" by hellogoodbye. It's about a guy who writes a letter to this girl he likes. Anyways, I'm sorry that the last post was me blowing up. Everything's alright now; trust me, I'm a lot better =] I've talked to the people that I was mad at and we're all cool now =D If you really want to know what was going on, let's just say I was having a rough week and a lot was getting to me and I was taking it all personally. But by talking to everyone that made me feel like that [and Kyle♥, of course], I'm over it and back to normal [understatement of the year there =P]. Other than that, I hung out with Clayton yesterday; the second time in almost two weeks =D He's so much fun! I really hope we get to hang out more often =] ^_^ Aren't we adorable? =] That's my beautiful teh hottie ^ That's my naked stick Clayton stripped [is it bad that I still have it with me in ...

So I just read someone who will remain nameless's blog entry for the second time and realized that the only person who honestly trusts me at the moment is Kyle♥, and even then he's afraid to tell me certain things because I'll get upset. What you all have to realize is getting angry, upset, happy, depressed...they're all a part of life. I deal with it how I deal with it, may it be listening to music that fits the mood or crying or watching some of my favorite shows. I'll admit that there are nights when I want to just go off and end my life, but I also know that everyone feels that way sometimes. So if you're one of the people I talk to and we're friends, please don't hold things back from me. Please. It makes me feel like I'm not trusted and that hurts so much worse than actually being pushed away. Yes, I would rather just be told to go away than not know what's going on in their life. I'm not saying I'm nosy, I just like knowing...

Today has had its ups and downs to say the least. Let's talk about ups first, shall we? [Even though I'm more of a downs person myself] I gave a speech on Keanu Reeves in Public Speaking today and I used a slideshow I made as my visual aide. Everyone loved it =] And they all love the fact that I can make slideshows on my laptop =D I'm just a cool kid, I guess. Then I discovered that my digital camera's video recorder records sound! I'm like ecstatic =D I was making videos all night. I then went to Joanna and Melissa's house and Melissa helped me with my English essay, which is all about Kyle♥ [gee, think I miss him much?]. And now for the downs [my favorite *rolls eyes*]. I was up until 2:30am talking to Donny, who I think I'm falling for again [sounds like the Three Days Grace song "Over and Over"]. I know nothing's going to happen though, because I know he doesn't want me like that [no one does anymore]. Then, I came home from ...

Oh, how much I love Evans Blue. I downloaded their entire new album [The Pursuit Begins When This Portrait Of Life Ends] and I'm just madly in love with it♥ =] "In a Red Dress And Alone" has to be my favorite track from it =D Anyways, we last left off with me wanting to take Jon back possibly. Well, he got a new girlfriend, only a day after telling me he loves me and would wait for me. I was horribly upset last night, which is why I didn't blog or anything, but I'm alright. I realize that he's happier with her and I need to accept it and be happy for him. Anyways, I know we'll still be friends, and that alone makes me happy =] So this means I'm single, which brings me to my next topic. In English today, we talked about what we find attractive in a guy. This would've been fine if had had some input, but no. The other girls completely took over and vetoed everything I said and that just shows how closed minded they all are. I'm sorry I ...

Wow, talk about lack of updating....I'm sorry, I've been incredibly busy and when I wasn't busy I just didn't feel like blogging; sad, right? Anyways, I'll just give you the main highlights of the past week or so. Cindy came over and we talked to Kory until almost 5am, in which they became pretty good friends. They still talk a lot, and maybe just maybe something will come out of this. Jon and I tried dating again. It was good until he started to break down and I had no idea how to help him. It wasn't like a Kyle♥ break down [those I can handle]. So right now, we're just friends. Maybe in the distant future after I get out of school and such we'll try again, but I don't know. I got the job at Price Chopper, finally. Went for Orientation last Wednesday and I start sometime this week, which means less updates from me, but at least now I can go on my Senior trip. I can't freakin' waitttt! It's going to rock! =D I had my 18th birthday...

My day was first up then slowly got down. I actually got my bus this morning, which was nice and I listened to my MP3 all the way to school. When we got to the school, I was blasting "Beg" by Evans Blue and thinking, "Gosh, this song is speaking to me somehow...gee..." but then I got breakfast and headed upstairs where I talked to Allyson about how I wanted Jon back and how jealous I was the Kyle♥ already found a Japanese girl to talk to. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm happy he's making friends, but I also know how much he likes Japanese women. I'm just jealous, that's all. Anyways, classes were a bit better today, except Chorus, because the teacher treats us like we're Kindergardeners. Then after class, all of us who were a part of Harmony and Choralaires came up and started discussing how we wanted them back, until this stuck-up girl decided that Choralaires wouldn't work, and the teacher of course agreed with her over Syri and I,...

First day back at school, and I already hate it. Ok, so hate is a strong word. But I really don't like it, except for Psychology. That class is amazing! =] Other than that, I've got Gym everyday and alot of Study Halls, so basically I've got an easy day, if I can keep up with all the work and crap. *sigh* And if one more teacher asks me about Kyle♥, I'm going to flip! I mean, yeah, I love the guy but to hear something about him in all my classes makes me realize how smart he is and, in turn, how stupid I am. But this is my year to show them all that I can be something better than I was in the past. Why do I say this? For the most part, it's because I've got Kyle♥ on my case this year and he won't let me fail. That's just another reason I love him so much =] In English, we got this packet about writing our College Admissions Essay, and in it, it listed blogger.com as a good site for blogging. I felt so cool, since that's what I'm using r...